At Times...

At times it seems that no one really understand the mental prison that I've been forced to live in. At times I have to ask myself "Am I really living" this can be the life that I deal with forever. Is there anyone out there that can "hear my call."I pray but it seems that God has given up on me. In reality all I want to be is free from this prison that constantly keeps me feeling like nothing. Why me? How come I have to deal with this? I'm in desperate need of a solution because everything else doesn't seem to work. At times...my life seems to go the way I want but then I'm reminded over and over again. This is my life so accept it. But I refuse to accept something God didn't plan for me. At times...In the meantime I just plan on living and keep praying that God pulls me free from the Devil's trap. I pray that He does something fast! Can you not see the pain and hurt I deal with it daily? I don't know where to go. Im lost in a world where corruption has become what we eat everyday and all day. Where is the truth anymore. Please, Please..Lord help free me.

"The Journey is not mine"

I respect your decision and what YOU must go through but the Journey is not mine.
You want me to follow but your destination is much closer.
Don't get me wrong we share the same love.
But Love just called you quicker!
Your compassion and devotion are admirable. However the journey is not mine.
The place where I am is good. I have my mishaps and share of mistakes.
But I know ultimately who has held me down and who will continue to hold me.
Let me make my mistakes(if they are)so that I can grow and learned from them.
That's the only way we truly learn!
He didn't assemble us to be perfect however, we should aim for that!
If you know yourself and type of person you are so does He.
He knows how many times you will mess up and stray a little from His Will(this is not a goal but it happens.)
All I'm saying is give me room to grow and become wise from my past.
I have to make my own decisions and do whats best for me.
Ultimately, I know where I want to be and I will get there as long as I believe.
He hasn't given up on me yet and I will NEVER give up on Him.
With that said I will continue to support you but "the journey is not mine".